A Little Something to Keep You Folks Occupied

This may be the least-prayer-related blog post I’ve ever done, but with the end of classes still two weeks away, I’m struggling to keep my head above water… so a random post seemed like a good idea. Here goes:

Today I was sitting in New Testament waiting for class to start, when I see that Dr. Plummer has brought a CD player to class. He sits it on the podium and explains that today, we will be doing some activities to help keep us awake since it’s so close to the end of classes. He hands out a photocopy of a lyric booklet from a cd. He tells us the story behind what we’re about to do. An acquaintance of his was making a Christmas CD and asked Dr. Plummer to do a paraphrase of the first part of John 1 from the Greek, something compelling and free-form. Then they recorded the translation over Alex O’Nan’s cool, spacey electronic music, resulting in a pretty awesome little Bible experience, if I do say so myself.

Well, the interesting thing is, before we start listening, Dr. Plummer confesses that he has no idea what kind of music it is. “I don’t know. Emo? I’ve heard of that before. It might be emo…” So that got me going on Emo. Then I looked down at our notes for that day’s lecture and my eyes came to rest on the phrase “Universal Redemptive Concepts” (a prominent theme in John’s Gospel, for those of you who are interested). What a great name for an Emo band! I thought.

And then I was done. With apologies to Dr. Plummer, I don’t know if I heard half of what he said for the rest of the class, because I was too busy looking around the room searching for “found” emo band names.

So here is a challenge: look around you right now and “find” emo band names. You can’t just make them up, they have to be inspired by actual objects or words that you see.

My list:

1. Universal Redemptive Concepts
2. Five Shelves
3. Space Heater
4. Commemorative Edition
5. Foil
6. Blue Ink
7. Maybe Mountain

… get the idea? Any actual Emo bands can feel free to use any of these names. I call “Foil” for my new Emo band. Kidding.


37 thoughts on “A Little Something to Keep You Folks Occupied

  1. 1. Members' Benefit Plan

    2. Inversion Table

    3. Not Enrolled

    4. Negative Image

    and my favorite emo band

    5. With A Feather (as in, Yyou coulda knocked down . . .”)

  2. Um, isn't “Foil” the method used to solve algebra equations? Hmm, how about…
    1. Mauve Torpedo

    2. Full Moon

    3. Dandelion Tears

    4. Landing Butterside Up

    5. Lending Happiness

    Actually, some of students resemble these remarks. It's great fun. Be well.

  3. I don't know . . . maybe
    1. Best-Loved Driving Tours

    2. Lost Letters of Pergamum

    3. Vectra Bank

    4. Faulty Reasoning

    5. Kleen Guard

    and how about

    6. Mark's Cell

  4. An alternate to the previously-posted joke:

    Q: How many emo kids does it take to change a light bulb?
    A: 5. One to go get the light bulb and the others to sit around and cry in the dark.

    Jonna — a foil is also a rapier-like fighting instrument, and a character who serves to highlight the actions of the protagonist. In verb form it also means to thwart. Hehehe… this is why I was an English major. What a nerd I am.

    Tom — geez, man, don't bust me for not paying attention in his class! The man's busy reading complex theology works and writing insightful articles and raising two kids… so he doesn't know the difference between electronic and emo. Big deal. πŸ˜‰

    Seriously, Allison, where are you? I was counting on some good ones from you!

  5. Laura,

    I was also thinking of some others. Do these work?

    Reverse Osmosis

    To the Quick

    Paper Cut
    (their music is not as deep as that of the previous band)

    (as in “We're not actually suffering from suicidal depression, but we are a carrier.”)

  6. Hahahah well I wasn't gonna bust ya but now that the idea is there πŸ™‚

    Actually I was just gonna be simple and say hey Doc what is EMO music?


  7. All~

    Laura, I can always count on you to educate me. Thanks. I'll try to fit that word into casual conversation sometime. And, how true about the number of emo kids…

    John and Debbie, I love the names. I can see some band using one those names in the future.

    Tom, I didn't know either. I had to have one of my high school students explain it to me. Apparently, I rather like that kind of music according to them.

    Have fun. Love well…

  8. What is an Emo band? Did you mean to write “Elmo” band?

    This has been Harvey Brown.

    I'm sure they have Christian Emo or Elmo bands that would have better lyrics for you than Negative Image or some of those others.

    Is the U2 and Emo band? There are artists on WJIE that sound exactly like the U2.

  9. Here's a website that “defines” emo music.

    Basic: “emo” is short for “emotional.” And yes, “Negative Image” would be a VERY good name for some emo bands.

  10. Mr. Brown, you're probably right. I'm sure that Christian “emo” bands would focus on the depth of their sin rather than on just being depressed and whiny. Complaining is a sin, too, so that would give Christian emo bands something else to sing about.

    j.ro, “The Vapors”? Like, (Southern belle voice), “Oh, Prissy, fetch my smellin' salts, I'm havin' the vay-pahs!”

  11. You're just jealous b/c you didn't think of it. Think of all the great connotative, emo meanings to be had in “the vapors.” If somebody feels like a vapor, they feel like they're transparent, they are easily spread thin, their only acknowledgment is for their abnormality, and people are usually trying to figure where they are coming from.

    your jest only gives me all the more reason to start a band called “the vapors” so I can write a song about you crushing my spirit in cyberspace. now, where did I put my chuck taylors…

  12. John Ross. Seriously. I wasn't making fun, that's just what immediately sprang to mind when I read “The Vapors.” But, on the other hand, if I were immortalized in an emo song… that would be SO-OO wicked! (Oh, Harvey Brown's gonna get me for that)

  13. More band names:
    Parliament (… or is that too much like the cigarette brand/ Parliament Funkadelic?)
    The Traitors

    All these “found” in random Wikipedia articles. Three cheers for Wikipedia! Hip, hip!

  14. Laura,
    hahah.. this is too much! I have to admit, I tried hard to be an emo kid once. Then I realized I'm just not deep enough/can't scream loud enough to cut it. Sigh.

    Love the diagram.

  15. sorry Laura…. Ive been caught up in marching band affiliations…. the end of the season is always chaos. But its all over now (finally) hmm.. Emo band names

    Alone in a Crowded Room

    Cutting Deep (ahahahahaha)

    Empty Chair

    Blank Tile

    Bent Phrase


    Burnt Soul


    Odd Place

    Modest Front Drive

    June Reason

    Days Life

    Sense Arc

    Rye Birth

    Burning Bend

    Bent Unknown

    Haha…. making emo band names is fun!!! the first one came from a song that was sund by an eno band called Jacks Mannequinn…. “Dark Blue have you ever been alone in a crowded room?”
    well then, theres not too much thats more emo than that! Can I get an amen?



  16. truth be told, i wish i was cool enough to be emo! but, i'm not, so i can't even think of any good names. the only names i can come up with have to do with food. i don't know why.

    n-e-wayz…when are you gonna post about those kids? maybe you haven't cause you're afraid. well, be verrry afraid!! be very, very afraid…

  17. WHew I've been outta the loop for a while, and am really only stepping back into it for a second to distract myself from the inevitable Theodicy paper I'm struggling to finish.

    I've been in a couple emo bands. Here are my submissions of made-up emo band names:

    1. Apple Yacks
    2. Schmincent Schman Gogh
    3. Press Mute
    4. Destiny's Child
    5. Puff Daddy
    6. Usher

    OKay those aren't really any good, and some of them are already taken.

  18. People. Some of y'all CLEARLY did not read the directions… these emo band names cannot be “made up,” they must be “found.” Because I'm a nice teacher, I'm going to give you one more chance. Read the original post and try again. OK? I'm very very serious about following rules when it comes to pretend-emo-band names. Get with it, folks.

  19. Yeah, well all of the first five I posted were visible in the room where I was sitting then. Remember?

    Here they are:
    1. Members' Benefit Plan

    2. Inversion Table

    3. Not Enrolled

    4. Negative Image

    5. With A Feather

    However there only a feather there, not actually the words “with a feather.”

    So . . . you think “Negative Image” is the PEFECT Emo band name?

    Laura's Dad<><

  20. oh, I totally read the directions wrong…. lol…. ill try this again.

    Empty CD Case…

    Drawer Pulled Out

    Blasphemous Keyboard

    lonely Pillow

    Calculating words (calculator)

    wow.. those are pretty stupid.. I think Im better at just making them up….

  21. How about “Harvey Brown's Message.”

    Harvey — I read on one of the blogs that you are putting together a Christian rap CD. I think you should do emo instead, and you could use the name I just provided. And of course, that would provide the context for all of your songs — they would be about your message to mankind.

  22. Bobby, that was an absolutely shameless plug for your latest post. You're stealing all the funniness from my blog, you jerk! Kidding. But only about the jerk part.

    But listen, y'all, I don't have to have the funniest blog or 17 comments in 4.5 minutes like Bobby, because I got to see NICKEL CREEK last night. If anyone wants to know, they were phenomenal. I know I'm all about the crazy superlatives, but I have never ever heard such musicianship in my life, and plus they were funny, and energetic, and basically it was amazing and my face has been ROCKED OFF. I mean, the bass player put his bass down and CLOGGED during one of the songs (holla, Lamarites!)… seriously.

    Debating whether or not I should tell you what rather surprising song they covered. Coloradans, they're at the Fillmore on December 1 (Jonna, this means you). The ticket was expensive but worth every penny, no lie.

  23. Nickel Creek is my favorite band. I saw them a couple weeks ago in Indy, so I'm sure I know what surprising song you're talking about — it brought the house down there, too.
    You're right — their musicianship is beyond belief. I think they're really hitting their stride as songwriters, too.

  24. Bobby, one interesting part about the show was that 4 out of the 5 guys who were sitting behind me were not fans of Nickel Creek when they walked in, and were HUGE fans when they walked out. It was cool to hear them express doubt before the show about a “bluegrass band” and then repeatedly use the word “awesome” afterwards.

    As for their songwriting, how about “Doubting Thomas” for complete transparency in lyrics? Seriously, everyone, go get their new album before I have to turn this blog into “Mad Enough to Love Nickel Creek.”

  25. I'm glad you are all on the same side of crazy that I am. I don't feel so lonely anymore.

    More emo band names:

    Imaginary Friends

    Lighten up


    Have great fun, all. I may check them out, Laura, thanks…

  26. Hey Laura —

    I know I'm late to the party, but here are my attempts:

    Dumb Lamp

    Corded Mug

    and lastly…

    Shirt Pile (fascinating potential for misreadings, of course)

    Hope all is well.


    (Yes, that gad.)

  27. OK, it's weird referring to you as “gad” but I guess it's what I have to do… πŸ˜‰ Comment more! It's good to hear from you.

    Bobby, somebody on Nickel Creek's blog gave away the surprising song. I was ticked. I'll never give it away.

  28. They've been doing it everywhere the last couple weeks. There's even a big thread about it on their fan site.
    I must say, I much enjoy their tongue-in-cheek version to the original.
    If they ever do a live concert DVD, I hope they include this song on the set list.

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